A List of Things That Annoy Me:
1. Having to repeat myself or listening to other people repeat themselves.
This is all too common in my household. It was said once, if you didn't catch it, it's not a big fucking deal. Your life will go on undisturbed. Particularly if the unheard comment was not even directed at you. If you decided to tune in on the middle of a conversation, deal with the fact that you're not privy to the entire first half.
2. Throwing the phone
Just unnecessary. Walk the extra three feet to hand it to me. You know I can't catch.
3. The way my mom blows air out of her mouth when she's annoyed
If you have something to say, say it.
4. The way my mom winces with pain dramatically when someone forgets to control the volume of their voice
I'm sure it didnt hurt that much
5. How loud commercials are
I'm not going to pay attention anyway
6. The way my little brother snorts snot up his nose
You will die of mucus saturation of the brain
7. When people are late without an explanation
It takes three seconds to call. It's fucking rude not to.
8. The way that my peers say, "I love you" when I say something really mean
There's got to be something else loveable about me. Also, why don't you put me in my place? I'm a huge jerk. Why do you continue to allow me to prey upon my peers? It just makes you feel better about yourself to hear me fly off the handle and say all of the things you were thinking but don't have the balls to say. Note: This comment doesnt apply to CQ
9. Thongs in the locker room
I'm just not interested
10. Little kids who try to guilt trip me with stuck out lips or fake crying
It will never, ever, ever work, and you know it. Give it up.
11. People who comment on the way that I interact with my boyfriend
Possibly I do like to do my homework while he sleeps with his head on my chest. It's really none of your concern. Worse even is people who have never really seen us together and go, "Aaaawww...you guys are so CUTE!"
12. American Idol
If you like to watch it, that's fine. Please don't stuff my ears with your opinions on people I've never even seen and don't care to see. Note: This is not targetted towards the Fox family. This is targetted towards the kids who talk about it nonstop in school.
13. Hillary Duff
You have the most annoying voice and way of shaking your head when you talk.
14. Ashlee Simpson
Wear some normal clothes and stop pretending your hair is black.
15. I am away from my computer right now.
Could you be any more lazy?
16. Adults who think they're kids.
Case in Point: Robert Collard
17. The kids in my creative writing class who think they're literary geniuses
No, Caitlyn was not trying to allude to the struggle of adolescence via irony in her piece about Humty Dumpty and I'm a Little Tea Pot. She was just whipping off a short peice because she had to write SOMETHING. You're just jealous that she can be candid and not deliberate over every word she writes.
18. People who make fun of me for my vocabulary
Honestly, my vocabulary is not advanced. Just because I slip the occasional superlative or reticent into a conversation doesn't mean that I'm some egg head who obsesses over knowing every word in the English language. It just means that I don't spend all of my time watching The Real World and Eurotrip.
19. People who make fun of me for the things I laugh about
I'm sorry that I don't see much humor in "cocks and pussies." Stop trying to convince me that genitalia are funny or jokes that make me feel uncomfortable about being female are amusing. It doesn't make me a tightass, it makes me different. I prefer to make my own fun rather than to sit back and be entertained. Entertaining myself means keenly observing the world around me. It doesn't mean watching shows that were written by middle aged men who still think they're fifteen. I'm eternally sorry that you don't understand me, but just lay off.
20. Intrusions upon my personal space
I like physical affection. I like heartfelt hugs and holding hands and snuggling on the couch with people I feel comfortable with. The list of these people is very short. If I don't touch you, chances are I don't want you touching me. I appreciate the occasional silly hug or kiss on the cheek, but don't do it just to be obnoxious and show how bold and funny you are. Just don't.
21. Heartless I Love Yous
If you don't mean it, don't say it. If you've only held one conversation with me and it was just because I was the fucking spokesperson for greif at our school, you can't possibly love me. Don't not talk to me for months and then blow me a kiss in the hall and yell, "I love you MK!" Only people that don't love me call me MK. Not kidding. Only awkward strangers who won't take the effort to say Mary Kate call me that. Aside from the people I have explicitly told it's okay to call me MK. This list is almost certainly limited to: Nick Thomspon, Matt Brady, and Michael Fox
22. Anti-Bush propoganda
Why bother? How is that pro-active at all? Why are you spending so much of your hard-earned cash on Bushism calendars and puppets when you should be putting it towards the retirement you allegedly won't have if his administration has their way?
posted by M.Jazz @ 6:06 PM
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